Bah Humbug Holiday Season for Curmudgeons

I see that we haven’t posted in awhile but when you are as grumpy as us we save it up for one monster post. There are so many things to discuss that it’s hard to pick just a few.

First off has to be the lack of trained help in any store that you go too.  They walk around in a daze and ask you if they can help but you know they can’t.  Here is a prime example.  Most people know that it does tend to get cold here in the upper mid-west.  Stupid us thought it might be possible to get a parka in the winter.  I probably should have started looking around my birthday in July.  Hard to think of parka’s in the middle of a heat wave.  The other day we went to a department store and said that we were looking for a “down” parka. The clerk asked us if that was a brand name. He had never heard of a down jacket or even a down pillow and when we tried to explain that it was a great warm filler he had no clue.  At this point we wouldn’t have been surprised if he had never heard of a goose or duck!  Maybe we are just getting too old.

Secondly the traffic is horrendous this time of year. People that only drive once a year are out so beware of them.  Apparently their cars or trucks don’t come equipped with turn signals and you have to read their mind. Also 9 out of 10 times they have a phone stuck to their ear and think of actually looking around at other cars as an option.

In spite of this we wish all fellow Curmudgeons a Very Grumpy Christmas with plenty of food and lots to complain about!!

A Grumpy Curmudgeon Thanksgiving

This is one of the few holiday’s that Curmudgeons like to celebrate. It’s not everyday that you get to pig out (or should I say turkey out?) and also when it’s over have months of material to complain about. Here’s the top four reasons Curmudgeons find Thanksgiving tolerable.

1. Lot’s of food and some down right terrible from people that don’t know how to cook. This will be sure to keep you grumpy at least through the New Year if not longer.

2. Plenty of Naps because your body has to digest all that food. Also a good excuse not to socialize with anyone.

3. You get to meet those awful relatives that you only see twice a year. One down and one to go. Make sure to pay attention to what they say because you can use that material later on.

4. It’s also a day without exercise which is always good. Not that Curmudgeons exercise anyway but at least on Thanksgiving it’s not talked about.

Turkey day only comes once a year so make sure you are as grumpy as possible.

A Day in the life of a Curmudgeon

Hopefully after reading this you will see if you are a true Curmudegeon.

12-2 PM: All Curmudegeons never see the morning. We are a grumpy bunch to begin with so why wake in the AM. This time is dedicated to wake up, have some caffeine and be overall grumpy.

2-5 PM: This is your time to go down your list and see what has to get done and what can be put off for a day or longer. Once you find what you have to do, go ahead and do it but don’t forget to grumble about it. An audience is always good so that they can hear you rant.

5-7 PM: Well now that you have done either mental or physical exercise (Both our bad for your health) it’s time to think about lunch. Eat whatever you feel like because you have had enough exertion for 1 day.

7-9 PM: Time to digest and because of the taxing day always allow this time for a nap to recharge yourself.

9-11 PM- This is a good time to get caught up on the computer. Answer those emails that those annoying people always send you. Surf the internet and see if you can find fellow curmudgeons. Being a grump it’s great when you can find others just like you. Delight in the new find you just found and brag to others. It’s a great site- http://grumpy-people.com/
You tell all your grumpy friends about it and order a personalized certificate because now you have a license to grump and your on the hall of fame.

12-3 AM: This is your time to make some supper, read some books, get grumpy because you feel like it.

3 AM: Time to call it a night because it’s tiring being a grump.

Do you have what it takes to be a Curmudgeon?